Our Brexit wellbeing survival guide
"The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, not to worry about the future, not to anticipate the future, but to live the present moment wisely and earnestly." ~ The Buddha
“Uncertainty is the only certainty there is, and knowing how to live with insecurity is the only security.” ~ John Allen Paulos
Navigating change
Change is perhaps the only thing we can be sure of, yet managing feelings of uncertainty can be hugely challenging. The ancient Buddhists, in their wisdom, knew change to be our one certainty, and that how we navigate this 'not knowing' can be the difference between feeling OK and feeling lost.
On some level, we all know change is inevitable, perhaps often desirable; yet day-to-day, we tend to find ourselves tossed around by fearful thoughts and emotions how about the future will unfold. On both a cultural and evolutionary level, we are primed to seek answers. For many of us, regardless of personal political leaning, the vacuum of insecurity, triggered in such a big way by the EU referendum, has left us feeling vulnerable and without anchor.
Suddenly, we’re confronted with huge questions, on which the future of our country (and perhaps also our own personal future) rest, and no-one - at least for now - can provide reassuring answers. Emotions are running high, and the drama isn’t only international and national; it’s also highly personal, as individuals - within groups of friends, colleagues, families - find themselves falling out in the face of different opinions.
With the referendum, social, political and personal fault lines that have perhaps existed for decades have come to a head in a clash, and unleashed a sea of emotions, of which fear and doubt seem most prevalent. Our addiction to social media, news programmes and the internet mean the barrage of speculation and ‘what if’ scenarios keep rolling, leaving us feeling permanently on-edge.
Personal wellbeing: self-care tips to weather the storm
So how is it possible to look after our own all-important wellbeing within the wider storm? Whilst we don’t claim to provide a definitive strategy, we thought you might be interested in suggestions around self-care at this time.
Strictly limit your consumption of news. There is a difference between being well-informed and becoming obsessive, though the balance can be hard to find. Most of all, avoid consuming the news in the evening, to give sleep the best chance.
Use social media mindfully. WIth a huge dollop of self-discipline, ban yourself from social media and the internet after 7 or 8pm. Leave the phone and iPad downstairs when you go to bed, or use technology entirely to listen to relaxation or meditation tracks. We highly recommend doing a Body Scan or Yoga Nidra practice in bed - you’ll find dozens of free meditations at the App, Insight Timer. Watch your sleep patterns improve!
Carve out time in nature - a 20-minute walk in a park can be all it takes to feel calmer, more grounded, and more connected to the bigger picture.
Prioritise your yoga or meditation (both, ideally!) practice; both your body and mind will thank you for it, and your nervous system will be soothed. With mindfulness training, we learn to notice our own patterns of habitual reactivity and to recognise that we have a choice how to respond to situations. We can also learn how to sit with difficult emotions rather than push them away. There is enormous spaciousness in this.
Take up an absorbing hobby: swimming, piano, painting - whatever you enjoy, and will take you into the present moment, into your senses, and away from the unknowable future (problems, questions and concepts).
Have compassion for yourself, and for others. It is the easiest thing to apportion blame and to get stuck in generalisations. We all believe what we believe due to a complex set of factors that include where we live and our life experiences. Now, more than ever, is the time for understanding and an ability to see the bigger picture. The alternative is simple: more acrimony and division.
Take wise action
When we feel anxious, restless or ill at ease, it can be tremendously helpful to take wise action to do something nurturing. For example, we can choose to take 20 minutes to turn off the news, light some candles and have a bath.
Or we can choose to take time out for a yoga or meditation practice, with five or ten minutes all that’s needed to help us climb out of heads and feel better. Try the following ten-minute meditation:
Turn of the internet and your phone, light a candle if you like; have this time for yourself, uninterrupted. Turn on a (soft!) alarm or timer, set for ten minutes.
Lie on your bed, or on a yoga mat, head supported by a low cushion. Place your feet flat on the floor, your knees raised. Cover yourself with a blanket if you like.
Gently place your hands on your lower abdomen, relaxing your shoulders.
Notice how you are feeling in your body, mind and emotions, without seeking to change a thing. Just a gentle, curious noticing. If you are feeling anxious, how is this felt in the body, in terms of direct sensations? Perhaps tightness or tension? Allowing whatever is here to be here, with kindness.
Begin to notice your breathing, without necessarily changing the breath. Can you feel the rise and fall of the abdomen under the hands?
Allow the breath to breath itself, noticing that each breath perhaps feels different, unique.
Now, each time you naturally breathe in, say the word ‘in’ to yourself. Each time you naturally breath out, say the word ‘out’ softly to yourself. When you lose the words and get lost in thought, that is totally ok and to be expected. Just patiently notice, and come back to the next breath, re-finding the words.
Allow yourself to feel the constant flux of the turning of the breath, going with the flow as best you can. Let go of any need to control the breathing - the body knows how to breath.
Keep returning gently to the words ‘in’, ‘out’, each time your mind slips into thought or worry. It is the coming back that is the meditation - the moment of mindfulness.
After ten minutes, notice how you feel, without judgement or expectation. You may feel calmer, you may not. The important thing is you have created a pause to notice how you are and to nurture your wellbeing.
Slowly make your way up and into the rest of your day.
“It’s not a terrible thing that we feel fear when faced with the unknown. It is part of being alive, something we all share.” ~ Pema Chödrön